


Despicable Moi

by notgeorgelucas



Series: The Bits [3]
Category: Despicable Me (Movies), Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Gen, he really is a loo-ser, rossi on ice is nice
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-31
Updated: 2020-12-31
Packaged: 2021-03-11 01:29:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 987
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28463148
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/notgeorgelucas/pseuds/notgeorgelucas
Summary: Hawkmoth meets his match...in three girls?
Series: The Bits [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1863814
Comments: 9
Kudos: 18





	Despicable Moi

Standing in the shadows of his lair, Hawkmoth stared out the window and chuckled malevolently to himself. “Yes, yes, fly my little akuma!” he cried to the darkness. “Soon my agent will once again be akumatized to spread evil and terror across Paris, and then the Miraculouses will be mine!” A long burst of ‘bwah-ha-ha’ filled the air; Natalie had warned him that it was becoming a habit, but sometimes a criminal mastermind just had to…

“Hello?” called an unfamiliar voice. “Anyone there?” A girl’s voice, possibly…but most definitely not his intended target. What was going on? Where was Lila Rossi?

“Who is this?” he called out cautiously.

“Oh, there you are!” the voice exclaimed. “Hey, nice to meet you. I know you were expecting someone else, but she’s…let’s just say she’s on ice for the moment.” Two distinct snickers could be heard under the dialogue. “Anyway, can I assume this is Papillion, or Hawkmoth, or whatever it is you’re calling yourself?”

“Like it matters,” snorted a second voice.

“Hey, let’s be polite,” admonished the first. “So, you’re probably wondering why you’re talking to us instead of her.”

“Who are you?” Hawkmoth repeated angrily.

“You know,” continued the voice breezily, ignoring him completely, “for someone who claims to be a master criminal, you really haven’t accomplished a whole heck of a lot, have you? We checked. You zapped a bunch of kids and a few adults into bad guys or monsters, but nothing really came of it, so what’s the deal?”

“Yeah, our dad stole the moon!” cried a third voice. “What have you done?”

“Looo-ser,” sneered the second voice.

“But you know,” the first voice continued, “you **have** raised a fuss in Paris and gotten the police and law enforcement groups here all riled up. And that’s interfering with Gisele’s plans.”

“Not ‘gazelle’,” the second voice jumped in. “She hates that.”

“Who?” Hawkmoth impatiently exclaimed.

“Oh wow. You mean you really don’t know who she is?” The first voice paused just a second. “Well, Gisele is **THE** evil mastermind of Paris…well, all France, really. She oversees all the organized crime syndicates. Are you sure you don’t know?”

“She’s actually very nice,” noted the third.

“So long as you’re not a loo-ser and piss her off,” the second voice chimed in.

“And you did,” the first voice continued. “In fact, you ticked her off enough that she actually called the Anti-Villain League and asked them to take care of you. Normally they wouldn’t bother with a cut-rate bad guy like you, but this way she owes them a favor. So, Mr. Ramsbottom assigned our mom and dad to the job. And that’s why we’re here.”

“We got out of school for this!” cheered the second voice.

“I like school,” the third voice complained.

“Oh, hi,” the first voice called out to someone. “You must be Ladybug and Chat Noir, right? Pleased to meet you. Big fans.”

Hawkmoth’s eyes widened. This was his opportunity, a chance to salvage something out of this disastrous situation. “Listen to me,” he said urgently. “I don’t know who you are, but obtain the Miraculouses from those two, and I will reward you beyond your wildest dreams…”

“Yeahhhh, I don’t think so,” the first voice declined. “You see, Gru and Doctor Nefario watched all your proxy battles with these guys and got an idea. They made this thing, based on Ladybug’s yo-yo, to catch one of your purple butterflies before it could infect someone. Once we snagged one, we could use it as a communications link…” The voice took on a distinctly evil tone. “…and a homing beacon.”

“Our dad’s an evil genius!” exclaimed the third voice. “Not like you!”

“Loo-ser,” hooted the second voice.

Hawkmoth turned at the sound of an odd rumbling coming from the main house. “What?”

“So in case you’re wondering, all we’ve been doing here is keeping you distracted until Gru and Lucy could track you down,” the first voice explained. “And it sounds like they’re arrived…along with some back-up.”

“Wait,” Hawkmoth pleaded. The walls were shaking and crumbling all around him. And amid the debris he could see…yellow?”

“Say hello to our little friends,” the first voice chuckled malevolently.

“Buh-bye,” called the second. “Loo-ser.”

“Yeah, loo-ser,” added the third.

“NOOOOOOOOO! NOT THE FACE! NOT THE FACE!"

*****

Margo nodded happily and switched off the device. “That takes care of him, I’d say.” She turned to a flabbergasted Ladybug. “I apologize for the minions. They don’t get out as much as they used to.”

“Uh…yeah,” Ladybug stammered, clearly at a loss.

Beside her, Chat Noir was staring at a large column of smoke rising into the Paris sky. “Wait. That’s m…Adrian Agreste’s house! We gotta go, bugaboo!” He soared into the air and was quickly lost from sight.

“I’m sorry. He’s right, though. I do need to check this out,” Ladybug said to the odd trio. “Oh, would you mind…?” She nodded toward the device (and sure enough, it did look like her yo-yo).

“Oh, sure thing!” Margo nodded, freeing the akuma.

Ladybug had it captured and cleansed in seconds. “Umm…thank you again for your help,” she said. “Stopping Hawkmoth once and for all will be wonderful.”

“No problem. Like I said, we’re big fans.” Ladybug smiled one last time and soared away toward the ever-darkening column of smoke. “Boy, I hope Gru’s able to get the minions calmed down. You know what they’re like when they’re on a roll.” She turned to her sisters. “Hey, you guys want ice cream? I think I saw a guy selling some down that way.”

“Awesome,” Edith agreed, but glanced back at the imprisoned Lila Rossi. “What should we do about her?”

Margo thought for a moment, then shrugged. “Ehhhh. She’ll thaw out eventually. Let’s go.”

“Think Gru’s going to make me give the freeze ray back?” Edith asked.

“Safe bet,” Margo replied.

“Awww.”

**Author's Note:**

> This is something that's been in my head for a while. I was initially a fan of Ladybug, but over time it just got...maybe I just want things to make more sense than they need to.
> 
> Gisele is an original character, a member of the League of Lady Villains (LLV) in Gru's universe. Along with her associates Tigress, Scorpion, Kali, and their leader Lucretia Delacroix, their primary purpose is to meet regularly for cocktails, gossip, and griping about their male counterparts. Yeah, I think about stuff like this more that I really should. But hey...


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